Seth Meyers Shares a Travel Horror Story About Taking Toddler Sons to Uruguay

-Seth, we love you. -I think it worked.
-It worked pretty well. You had to wait a little bit.
-You have to wait a little bit, but you should be able
to wait for friendship. -Right?
-Yeah. Hey, so I know you’re not
supposed to touch your face and I’m not supposed
to touch my face. -That’s correct.
-The thing I can’t — the CDC guidelines
have not made — Am I — Can we touch
each other’s faces? [ Laughter ] -Oh, that’s
an interesting thing. -Yeah, so, like,
when I want to think… -Oh —
-I should do like this. -Yeah.
-Yeah. Yeah, we can do that. -So, just, if at any point
during tonight’s interview it seems like I’m being
thoughtful, I invite you to — -I will.
-Be — ‘Cause I think
that’s totally safe. -That’s totally safe. Right?
We agree with that. Alright, let’s check — Someone’s calling
the CDC right now. -They’re going to
call the CDC right now? Okay. -Yeah. We have their —
We have their home number. So it’s perfect. How’s the family doing?
How’s the kids? -They’re great.
-How old are the kids now? -They’re coming up on 2 and 4. -Wow.
-So much fun to be around. -Still little babies, though.
So cute. -Still little kids.
We just took them on a big trip. -Oh, where?
-Yeah, we went to Uruguay. Yeah.
-That really is — -You know, ’cause that’s like
the new Disney World. [ Laughter ]
-Uruguay? -Yeah, my wife said,
“We should go to Uruguay. I hear it’s beautiful.”
And so I said, “Sure.” And then — And the plan was —
She sold it to me like this. You fly to Miami from New York, and then you get on
a flight to Uruguay that leaves at 10:00 at night and gets there at 10:00 in the
morning, so there’s no jet lag. It basically goes
straight down, right? -Okay.
-So, she was like, “The kids will sleep all night. It will be easier — way easier
than you think it is.” So, I’m like, “Great.” Then we fly
from New York to Miami, and once we board
the flight to New York, we get an alert that, “Your
flight from Miami to Uruguay has been delayed…12 hours.” [ Laughter ] Which is the next day. Which is not a delay. That’s —
I’ve been rescheduled. That is not —
-That is not — Yeah. Yeah, that’s not a delay. -If you were at your doctor’s
office, and the doctor was like, “I’m going to be
a little delayed, so just wait here
till tomorrow” — [ Laughter ] -No, that’s
a rescheduling, yeah. -So, we land in Miami. We have to take a shuttle bus
to, like, an airport hotel. And the bummer, the burn is,
we’re like, we’re piling out. Everybody’s in a terrible mood.
And we get off the shuttle bus, and it’s just this sort of
nondescript airport hotel, and we walk in, and my son goes,
“Daddy, it’s beautiful.” [ Laughter ]
And I’m like, “Why are we going to Uruguay?”
-“Going to Uruguay? We could just go to a hotel!”
-He loves this. -He loves this.
-Yeah. I’m going to show him
the ice machine, and he’s going to lose his mind. [ Laughter ] And then — We had called ahead
and said, “Look, we need two cribs.”
-Yeah. -And they said, “Absolutely.
We can guarantee the cribs, but we can’t set them up
until you get here.” ‘Cause, you know,
it was like 11:00 at night. And, you know, our kids
are never up that late. And so we said, “Can you please
have them set up? ‘Cause we want to come in –” And they said,
“It’s not our policy.” And I wonder
why they won’t do it. Do they need to see the kids? -Yeah, like, we had a bigger one
for that kid and a little one — -Yeah. Or I was like,
“Do they think we’re like some weird
crib fetish people that just –” -Yeah, “We want to see
your kids first before we give you
a kid’s crib.” -“We don’t want to just let
you guys mess around in cribs.” -This ends up
on the Internet, yeah. -Yeah. And, so, we got a couple cribs. And we’re, like, slap happy
at this point. You know,
everything’s gone wrong. -Yeah, you think
you got it all figured out. You never do, right? -Yeah, and then
they brought one crib, and I said, “It’s two.” And the guy said,
“Oh, we only heard one.” And I said,
“We definitely said two.” And then he definitely,
like, broke protocol, he said, “I was supposed
to say that. The reality is
we’re out of cribs.” And he goes, “There are too many
people here who need cribs.” And I’m like,
oh, now all of a sudden I understand their policy
of see the kids first. -Yeah, yeah, yeah, ’cause
they want to just tell you while you’re already there
in the room. You’re, like, unpacked. -And so then we said
to our older — So they were like,
“We think it’s going to be a full 45 minutes
to get another crib. We have to go to another hotel.” And our little one
just crawled — I’d never seen him
do this before. He was so tired, the 2-year-old. He basically vaulted himself into his own crib…
-Wow. -…and was asleep
by the time he hit the ground. -Good sleeper, yeah.
-So we say to the older one, “Hey, man, do you want
to just sleep in bed with Mommy and Daddy tonight?” And then, you know that thing, the minute you tell a kid
they can’t have something, he’s like, “No, I need —
I love a crib!” [ Laughter ] He’s like, “I love a crib!”
It was like, “I’m the crib guy!” -Yeah. Yeah, that’s — yeah.
[ Laughter ] That’s like my mom
at a restaurant, always like, “I love a booth!
I have to be in a booth!” It’s like,
“It’s just a table, Mom.” Yeah. -Yeah. So then 45 minutes later, now we finally got two cribs,
and we get our kids in. And again, we have to wake up in, now at this point,
three hours to go back to the airport
to get on our flight. -Oh, my gosh. -And my son wanted us
to play music, because sometimes at night,
he wants us to play songs that he likes.
-Sure. -And so we’re trying to just
pick one of the songs. ‘Cause we’re like,
“He’s going to fall asleep as soon as we play a song.” So we’re just trying to find
something quiet to play for him. And then he again locks in, and he was like,
“I. Want. ‘Jingle Bells.'” This is two weeks ago, so — Basically we’re like, “We’re not
going to play ‘Jingle Bells.'” -I love this kid. -And again, he’s like,
“I love Christmas music!” -I love this kid.
[ Laughter ] -I will say,
it was that great thing ’cause I do sometimes think terrible vacations
bring families together, and you talk about them
the rest of your life, right? -It’s true.
-If a vacation goes too well, you just forget about it
and never speak of it again. This one, we’re going
to talk about forever, because Alexi and I were in bed
holding each other, shaking with silent laughter, ’cause you don’t want to reward
this nonsense. -Yep.
-But our son — I was like, I think in the
history of this airport hotel, no one in February
has been like, “‘Jingle Bells,’
or I’m going to lose my mind!” [ Laughter ] -Never.
-Never. And so then we —
Next day, so then again, our flight to Uruguay,
which was 10 hours, was supposed to be
in the middle of the night. It’s in the middle of the day. So it’s 10 hours of your kid
being awake on a plane. Not fun at all. Get to Uruguay, most beautiful
country in the world. Really great,
have an incredible time. Get back, and then
I bring my son to school, you know, the week — Monday
after we get back. And he walks in, and I just
hear him saying to kids, like, “And there, we had two cribs!” And I’m like, “He’s still
talking about the hotel.” -He loves the hotel!
-All he cares about is the hotel.
-He loves the hotel! -That was his story. -More with Seth Meyers
when we come back, everybody. Stick around. He loves that!
That’s all you need.


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